What is it we are looking for? It is confusing to answer this question. We want to enjoy the solitude and when we are alone; our mind observes memories or reflects on our aspirations for the future, eventually distancing ourselves from the now. Now, we want to be a part of the world again; so either we engross ourselves in a literary read like a novel, watch TV / play game/ surf internet or pick up the phone and give in to being social again. And after this, go back to being alone and trying to do something different; to break routine. If successful in achieving this, we want to now share the experience with everyone, as if the act just done without being shared did not bring enough joy. While on the other hand, if we do not achieve in doing something different from the rote routine; we share about it being a silly thought and engage ourselves in a novel, watch TV / play game/ surf internet mindlessly or pick up the phone and being social again.
Is this really how it is supposed to be? Or is it just me. I am not sure. And I am confused. What is this feeling; to make ourselves happy; this chase / pursuit for happiness? A sudden thought; that can excite us so much that it lights up the whole day and at times confusing muddled thoughts; that take over the pureness and power of that one good thought.
Now I am going back to reading a fictional story. Is it because I feel the unreal world is much more immersive than the real one? Yes, maybe.